Scott Norwood

Scott Norwood
Wide Right started it all.

Sunday, August 2, 2020

2020 NFL Hall of Infamy Inductions

The only Hall of Fame induction show in our year of Coronapalooza 2020 is right here at In Much Less Detail. In this, our tenth year of the Hall of Infamy, I can only hope to exceed expectations and entertain and inform to the best of my abilities. Here we go! The 2020 NFL Hall of Infamy inductees are as follows:

  • Wendell Davis - Wide Receiver - Chicago Bears. Infamous for: Suffering one of the most gruesome injuries on the field. 

Go to the 9:24 mark for the injury.

Jay and I have referred to this incident countless times throughout the years because we were both watching the game when it happened. If it's not the main reason why the Eagles got rid of that concrete-like artificial turf, it's right up there. The day was October 10, 1993. The Bears were beating the Eagles on a pleasant sunny day when QB Jim Harbaugh--yep, that Jim Harbaugh--lofted a deep ball for Davis who planted to jump for the pass...and never jumped. He just collapsed to the ground, sobbing in pain. Viewers didn't know at the time, but Davis's cleats had gotten caught in a seam in the turf and when he jumped, he tore the patella tendon in each of his knees. Reports were that his kneecaps had been pushed up all the way into his thighs. Davis never played football again. The Vet turf has a case for its own enshrinement, claiming a multitude of victims during its reign of terror, the most infamous being the Michael Irvin neck injury that shortened the Hall of Famer's career. But for us watching in Chicago, the Wendell Davis injury is marked in our minds indelibly as the standard for horrific non-contact football injuries.

  •  Chris Zorich - Defensive Lineman - Chicago Bears. Infamous for: Being the role model for everything you want in a football player except for the playing football part. A couple of years before the Wendell Davis injury, the Bears drafted a man who had very high hopes and expectations placed on him despite only being a second-round pick. How is that possible, you may wonder? Well, a special group of circumstances made him out to be something he wasn't quite ready to be. His name was Chris Zorich. He was an All-American Notre Dame defensive tackle who won the Lombardi Trophy in 1989 and was MVP of the '91 Orange Bowl. Before that, he stood out at Chicago Vocational High School, not just as a player but as an exemplary person off the field. Being half black, Zorich had the lofty hopes and dreams of the entire black community as being the perfect example of what can be achieved with hard work and opportunity. And going to Notre Dame only enhanced those hopes and dreams, since Notre Dame was in its heyday of propping itself up as above all the other dirty college football programs, with the "Catholics vs. Convicts" feud with Miami firing up around that time. Take all that and have him drafted by the hometown Bears, the Monsters of the Midway, and you have a kid set up to be a superstar, right? Not quite. In five years with the Bears and five games with the Redskins, Zorich managed all of 16½ sacks, four forced fumbles, and one touchdown. But hey, he was a Pro Bowl alternate in 1993! Zorich may have never done much in the NFL as part of another franchise, but being in Chicago with the weight of the whole city on his shoulders certainly could not have done him any favors. When you hear that a draft prospect in any sport should not want to be taken by his hometown team, normally it's because there are bad influences to distract him at home, but sometimes it's because the pressure would be too much for a kid to handle. Everyone would love to be the next LeBron James, but no one wants to be the next Chris Zorich.

  • Danyelle Sargent - Broadcasting napalm. Infamous for: Displaying high-grade levels of unprofessionalism on multiple occasions. Sports fans are well aware of the endless stream of ladies tasked with reporting or broadcasting while looking pretty. Some are good at it, some are not. But one was so bad that she is the precautionary tale for all who came after her. On March 9, 2006, Danyelle Sargent was working the desk on ESPNNews next to a young Robert Flores when their highlight package encountered some technical snafus. As Flores struggled through the package, Sargent, thinking her microphone was closed, loudly exclaimed to someone off camera, "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?!?" This went out live to everyone watching at home. That was effectively the end of Sargent at ESPN. So that had nothing to do with football. Why is she in the NFL Hall of Infamy? Because Fox Sports decided to give her a second chance as a sideline chick, and she used that opportunity to embarrass herself yet again. In 2008, Sargent was interviewing the new coach of the San Francisco 49ers, Coach Psycho himself, Mike Singletary. She sputtered and stumbled through a question where she asked him about calling his mentor Bill Walsh after being hired as Niners coach. A stunned Singletary couldn't muster an answer before Sargent apologized and wondered aloud, "What was wrong?" This didn't make air, but it's also captured on Youtube for the world to see. What was wrong? How did you figure Bill Walsh was Mike Singletary's mentor considering Singletary never played for him or coached under him? Oh, and one more small thing: Singletary was hired in 2008. WALSH DIED IN 2007. That's what's wrong honey. Sargent got more broadcasting chances before doing what most no-talent sideline chicks eventually do: Married someone richer and smarter, in her case college basketball coach Eric Musselman. But even though her career is down the toilet, Danyelle Sargent is immortalized in our Hall of Infamy as the exemplary Godawful sports reporter. What the fuck was that, indeed.

  • Kellen Winslow II - Tight End - Cleveland Browns, mostly. Infamous for: Failing to follow in dad's footsteps but succeeding as a serial rapist. As referenced in the Chris Zorich post, high expectations can cause destruction for a player before his pro career can even get off the ground. In Kellen Winslow II's case, his name and prolific college career set him up for failure, along with being drafted by the totally wrong franchise. Kellen Winslow is a Hall of Fame TE known for being one of the legit toughest and most talented at his position. His son put up a couple of first-team All American seasons at TE for the U. of Miami, setting him up to be drafted #6 overall in 2004 by the pitiful Cleveland Browns, who were coached by Butch Davis, the man who recruited Winslow II to Miami. Winslow couldn't stay on the field to produce for Cleveland, breaking his leg after his first two games, then tearing his ACL in a motorcycle accident the next year, then suffering a staph infection in 2008 along with several other members of the Browns. Winslow II had productive years for Tampa Bay but would never be as good as his Cleveland days. But he found another way to use his physicality. Winslow II was arrested in June 2018 on kidnapping and rape charges, and a charge was later tacked on that he raped an unconscious 17-year-old in 2003. In November 2019, facing multiple rape and lewdness charges, he cut a deal and plead guilty to the teen rape and a sexual battery of a 54-year-old hitchhiker, providing a wide range of abilities he never displayed in the NFL. Winslow II will get 12-to-18 years and lifetime parole whenever he gets out, but until the sentencing, he will have to accept his honors here, joining Darren Sharper as Hall of Infamy members who couldn't keep their members in their pants.

  • Super Bowl XXXVIII Wardrobe Malfunction. Infamous for: Providing more exposure than any other halftime show in history. It's the reason we had to endure 70-year-old rockers at Super Bowl halftime shows for a decade after, it's the reason every live sporting event must be on what feels like a ten-minute delay--yes, it's the infamous Wardrobe Malfunction. It happened so quick that I was watching live and still missed it, but--you guessed it--Youtube is there for you in your moment of need.
Go to the :57 mark for the malfunction.

It was at the Patriots-Panthers Super Bowl in 2004 in Houston. The halftime show was Janet Jackson, one of the hot pop acts of the time, and the finale was Justin Timberlake performing his song "Rock Your Body" and starring Janet as the guest hook singer. Now, you have to understand what line Justin was singing when Nipplegate occurred so that you never again wonder if it was an accident. I'm telling you, it was totally planned. At the moment Justin sings "Bet I have you naked by the end of this song," Justin grabs Janet's breast and rips off part of her outfit, exposing her naked right breast adorned by a very intricate nipple piercing design. Think about how many things had to go a certain way for that to be an accident. Justin would have had a different move to end the act other than grabbing and pulling Janet's breast, Janet would have had to have the worst costume planning for it to detach at just that right time and along just that particular stitching, Justin would have had to sing any of the other lines in his song, none of which talk about having his girl naked--these would have all had to be coincidental occurrences happening at the same time. The only other explanation is that all of that was planned but Janet was supposed to have clothing underneath and just chose not to on her own, which would actually make sense. After all, Janet's career enjoyed a resurgence after the incident, and she became the most Googled person of 2004 and 2005. But she also was shamed and blacklisted afterwards in a way Justin never was, which was unfair. In any event, the FCC hammered down fines for the one-second exposing of a woman's chest, and some people reacted as if it was a harrowing experience that darkened their world. In the end, it was a hot woman's tit popping out for a moment. We should all be so harrowed.

And there is the Hall of Infamy Class of 2020. See you for football in a month, or if COVID-19 is still running wild, see you when it's safe again.