- ...and let the annual Denver Broncos decline begin.
- Poor Buffalo. Fighting their hearts out, competing every game, but just can't figure out how to win one. Actually, they kicked the game-winning FG in OT, except KC coach Todd Haley got a timeout in barely before the kick, and the re-try hit the upright. The Bills should cheer up, though: They get the Bears next.
- ...and we have our first FedEx Mail-It-In team of the season. The Dallas Cowboys, by all accounts, have quit. At least the defense has. How else to explain getting carved up by the mediocre David Garrard? Jon Kitna and the offense didn't give up, as Kitna threw for 379 yards. But the four INTs ruined Dallas's day, although many of those picks came off the fingertips of the intended receivers. I can't speak for Jason, but I assumed that the lack of pressure on the Cowboys after the loss last week sent them to a horrific 1-5 would cause them to relax and get the win this week. We were dead wrong.
- I hate Sam Bradford. I hate Sam Bradford. I hate Sam Bradford. I hate S...ok, I won't write it on the chalkboard 100 times like in school. But you get the idea. Just for comparison's sake, the QB numbers from the Panthers-Rams game: Carolina QB Matt Moore, 23-37-194, TD, 3INT. St. Louis QB Sam Bradford, 25-32-191, 2TD. Call me crazy, but those numbers look very similar except for that TO part. Still think Bradford is a miracle worker?
- The luckiest TD catch in history still couldn't save the Bengals from defeat. A steady running game and another big performance by kicker Dan Carpenter, who might get into the Hall of Fame based on this season alone, was all Miami needed to come from behind and catch the Bengals by the tail. That's four losses in a row for Cincinnati, who are trying to give "hapless" a whole new meaning.
- Rex Grossman, huh? Wow. Mike Shanahan really done did it now. He's already getting much less than maximum performance from DT Albert Haynesworth thanks to his treatment of Albert during training camp. Fuck that Haynesworth is his best defensive player, he had to learn that Mr. Shanahan is the new boss in Washington and no one else matters. Then, Shanny this Sunday made the decision to yank QB Donovan McNabb from the Redskins-Lions game with the Redskins down one score. The reason? Well, there were under two minutes left in the game, you see, and backup QB Rex Grossman had a better grasp of the two-minute offense, given that he studied it as a backup in Houston under Skins coordinator Kyle "Whaddaya Mean I Only Have This Gig Because I'm Mike's Son?" Shanahan. What. The. Fuck. It couldn't have been more apropos that Grossman took the ensuing drive about four inches before being sacked and fumbling the ball for a Detroit TD. But wait, the dumbest coaching decision of the year gets better. Yesterday, Shanahan clarified his postgame stance that Grossman gave Washington "the best chance to win" by saying that McNabb also wasn't in very good shape and, in fact, Shanny considered not even playing McNabb at all before the game started. That's 13 points and a passing TD in the 2nd quarter by the QB who shouldn't have been playing. That's also a halftime lead for the Skins, so maybe the D should be looking to get replaced in the next game. Honestly, Shanahan's ego is larger than Charlie Sheen's Hooker/Porn Star Rolodex. He's got two rings with John Elway and zero playoff wins without him. He's garbage.
- ...and let the annual New York Jets decline begin.
- San Diego trailed Tennessee 19-7, and our pick of the Titans was looking really good. Then the Chargers remembered the only things they know how to do well, which is get receivers open for QB Philip Rivers and get the ball no matter what to TE Antonio Gates. And the rest is history.
- Arizona needs a QB, stat. There's no need to worry about them contending ever again until they find one grown man who can actually play QB without throwing the ball consistently to the wrong team. On the other side, welcome this week's hottest free agent fantasy pickup, RB LeGarrette Blount, who really punched the Cardinals in the face with his hard running style. No, not literally.
- Two catches by WR Brandon Tate could have both contended for Luckiest Catch of the Year in a week that didn't have Terrell Owens in it. But luck plays a big part in some wins, and it did for New England over Minnesota. The most obvious question of all time is also one that will never be answered: Why the fuck did the Vikings trade a 3rd-round pick for Randy Moss and then cut Moss several weeks later? Did they not know they were acquiring a brooding asshole who has no use for anyone who isn't bowing at his feet?
- It's feast or famine for Oakland QB Jason Campbell, who has now followed an abortion of a game at San Francisco with two straight games with a passer rating of over 120. And he hosts a Kansas City team next week near the bottom of the pass defense rankings. Should be a third straight big game for Campbell, right? Right??
- Steelers-Saints was fun to watch, two pro teams hammering it out in a tough matchup. New Orleans pulled it out because, realizing that the running game was going nowhere (30 team yards), they opened up the Air Show, and QB Drew Brees and his receivers made the plays late to wrap it up. The strip of Pittsburgh TE Heath Miller was a huge play too, because the Steelers and QB Ben Roethlisberger seemingly were just starting to get the offense to top gear when that strip occurred.
- No one ever heard of half of those guys who caught balls for the Colts on Monday night. That's the beauty of their offense, and of their leader, Peyton Manning. The formula seems so easy: Early Colts lead, then Dr. Manning performs surgery on the defense all night, moving the chains methodically while the lightning fast pass rushers Freeney and Mathis get to go after the QB because the opponent has to throw to play catch-up. I admit that I love Peyton Manning more than a man should, but would it really surprise anyone to see the Colts go on a run using that formula that saw them lose, like, one more game the whole rest of the regular season?
YTD Records--Dre 59-57-1, .509; Jay 55-61-1, .474
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