Week 13 ATS Recap: Where Quit Trumps Stupid

Picks We Both Won (4)

• Jets 7, Cardinals (+6) 6 - Locally, we were treated to the ending of this game as a live look-in. I got to see enough of the network broadcast to see that Greg McElroy was named player of the game. McElroy threw the "game-winning" pass and threw for 29 yards. It made me glad that I didn't have to see the rest of the game, even though seeing Mark Sanchez benched would have made me happy. Nice to see the Cards and Dre's new favorite coach Ken Whisenhunt gained a whopping 137 yards of total offense. Glad to see that QB change is working!
• Texans (-6½) 24, Titans 10 - Yeah, this was the game we were worried about. This is why I'm winless on my locks.
• Browns (-1) 20, Raiders 17 - The Brown Fever left The Black Hole the same way it does all of us: as shit.
• Bengals (-1) 20, Chargers 13 - Yep, still done with the Bolts.

Picks We Both Lost (5)

• Rams (+7½) 16, Niners 13 (OT) - Some teams just have the other teams number. Too bad these two don't play again this season, cause I'd be ALL OVER the Rams.
• Chiefs (+3) 27, Panthers 21 - Sadly, it took a murder-suicide to even notice this game.
• Bills (-6) 34, Jaguars 18 - Looks like the Chad Henne Express was getting full, cause Dre and I hopped on that baby and crashed the fucker.
• Broncos 31, Bucs (+9½) 23 - Deja vu all over again: the Broncos were once again handed a big spread to cover and managed an 8 point win, putting me on the wrong side of picking a squoosh. Fool me twice, shame on me.
• Steelers (+9½) 23, Ravens 20 - I'm sure that Dre, Mr. "Fuck You Faggot Ravens" will have an earful for me on this one next week. How do you have a lead and cough in up to Charlie Batch? I was watching a retrospective special on NFL Network about greatest blunders ever, and the Thanksgiving Day coin toss game was on there, from 1998. You know who was QB for the Lions that day? Charlie Fucking Batch! That's So Ravens!

Picks Dre Won Head to Head (3)

• Falcons (-3½) 23, Saints 13 - Leave it to me, I fell in love with the hook here, even though I expected Atlanta to avenge their loss of a few weeks back. Even though Drew Brees channeled his inner Carson Palmer, the Falcons couldn't do much with all the turnovers, and looked really timid on a big stage. While they most likely delivered the death blow to the Saints playoff hopes, their sluggish play on offense will be something to watch in the postseason.
• Seahawks (+3) 23, Bears 17 (OT) - So the Bears let one of the worst road teams walk into Soldier Field and gut out a win. Hmmm, OK. But look what I noticed, Dre during the picks guaranteed a Bear win over the Vikings NEXT WEEK. After picking the Vikings not to cover at Green Bay (which they did). So, sorry Dre, I have to take Minnesota next week cause I know what happens when you pick games two weeks in a row. Sorry, Bears, Dre doomed you.
• Patriots 23, Dolphins (+9) 16 - We had a few garbage time losses (wins) this week, and here I came up short. The Pats had just gone up 10 win a minute to go, yet still let the Fins waltz into FG range and knock out a quick FG before trying an onside kick. Wow, thanks.

Picks I Won Head to Head (4)

• Packers 23, Vikings (+9½) 14 - Looks like I read one right, as the 200+ yard effort from Adrian Peterson amounted to me covering by a hook on a huge spread. The Vikings did miss a late FG that would have made this a little closer, but a cover is a cover. I'll take it.
• Colts (+6) 35, Lions 33 - When we made our picks, we debated the Stupid Power Rankings, as in ranking teams by how dumb they are. The Lions were a top-5 team, and here again, up 12 with 4 minutes to go, managed to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. Great job being opportunistic, Indy, but the Lions just gave you that one.
• Cowboys 38, Eagles (+10½) 33 - Our current leader in the Stupid Power Rankings, the Dallas Cowboys, must have allowed one of the cheapest backdoor covers I've ever seen, and I've seen lots. Seriously? A 98 yard punt return with 30 seconds left to when you were up by 11. In the realm of Quit vs. Stupid, give me Quit every time.
• Redskins (+3) 17, Giants 16 - It looks like Mike Shanahan may have quit on his team too soon. Save for a ridculous blown coverage against Victor Cruz at the end of these two teams last matchup, the Skins would be in first place. Instead of quitting on your team Mike, how about not letting guys get behind your secondary at the end of games!