Week 14 ATS Recap: Four Steps Forward, One Step Back

OK, so Dre gets to gloat about the one pick he beat me on this week, and of course it's the one I changed my mind on. I'll take that every week if it means I can pick up three games in the overall picks. Nice job on the Indy win, Dre!

• Steelers 14, Browns (+14) 3 - Both losers - I'm not doing so well with these Thursday night games. The Steelers, yet again, failed to impress against an inferior foe in prime time. I know we knock Baltimore for playing down to their competition, but Pittsburgh has laid recent eggs against the Chiefs and now the Browns.


• Jaguars (+3) 41, Bucs 14 - Both losers - Jacksonville didn't score 41 (37) in their last three games COMBINED. With games left against Dallas, Carolina, and Atlanta, I'll call it now: Tampa wont win a game the rest of the year.


• Patriots 34, Redskins (+9) 27 - Jason winner, Dre loser - So Tom Brady throws a red zone pick that seals this win for me, then promptly tries to throw his receiver on the play under the bus, and his coach calls him out for in in plain view on the sidelines. Good for the New England coordinator for getting on Brady's ass. It was a bad throw into coverage in a spot where all the Pats needed was a field goal. I was watching a lot of picks not going my way toward the end of the early games on Sunday, and little miracles started happening to turn losers into winners. Good job, Brady!


• Texans (+3) 20, Bengals 19 - Jason winner, Dre loser - Speaking of little miracles. Houston needed an 80 yard drive and a last second TD to spring the "upset" on a very game Cicinnati team. It would have been easy for the Texans to fold up the tent after losing their first AND second string QBs, their best offensive playmaker, and thier best pass rusher. Houston has shown amazing tenacity through adversity, something the Colts (who lost ONE player) should be watching.


• Jets (-10½) 37, Chiefs 10 - Both winners - We saw this one coming. The Chiefs made the Jets look like an offensive juggernaut, and then promptly fired their coach.


• Lions 34, Vikings (+9½) 28 - Both winners - If I can see Joe Webb's helmet turning sideways the first time watching the play live, how can the refs not see it? If Detroit somehow manages to back into a playoff spot, I guess I can't be mad since they did get hosed last year at Chicago on the Calvin Johnson completing-the-act-of-the-catch bullshit. It all comes around.


• Saints (-3½) 22, Titans 17 - Jason winner, Dre loser - Jake Locker is offically Captain Almost Comeback. He's good at brining his team back, just to lose anyways.


• Eagles (+3) 26, Dolphins 10 - Both losers - Can you believe this shit? Philadelphia wins one game, to get to FIVE wins, and the media is resurrecting their "the Eagles are still alive" stories. Sure, the Eagles can win out to get to 8 wins and have a mathematical chance to make the playoffs, but this story is so lame it makes me want to watch more Tebow coverage. I just became the biggest Jets fan around, because I'm hoping Gang Green sticks the final, final, final, final, final fork in the stupid ass Eagles.


• Ravens 24, Colts (+16½) 10 - Dre winner, Jason loser - You got me on this one Dre!


• Falcons (-1½) 31, Panthers 23 - Both winners - I was set to pick Carolina all week but something kept nagging me right up until the point I flipped over to Atlanta: Carolina can't close games. Reminded of the first matchup between these two, which saw Carolina leading after three quarters just to give up 17 unanswered 4th quarter points, I decided that Atlanta would play smarter and was simply the better team. Look what happened, Carolina was up 16 at the half, just to give up 24 unanswered 2nd half points. History does repeat itself.


• Broncos 13, Bears (+3½) 10 (OT) - Both losers - The hook killed us here, just as the Bears fell on their own sword late in this one. Marion Barber made two critical mistakes, mistakes big enough to take peoples minds off of: 1) Caleb Hanie AND 2) Marion Barber was one of the reasons the Bears almost won. I figured something out about this Tebow thing too, about how he's able to keep coming back: his opponents have no respect for his game, and even after they are beaten, still can't believe it. Brian Urlacher even tossed a mighty underhanded compliment to Tebow, saying the Bears lost to a great running back. It's the doubt and the "I can't believe this is happening to US!" attitude that just fuels the Tebow mania. Sure, the Broncos are riding an incredible defense and even more incredible amounts of luck, but sometimes you make your own luck. Hell, it got Urlacher to a Super Bowl!


• Cardinals (+3½) 21, Niners 19 - Both losers - The Cards have gone into all out spoiler mode these last couple weeks, knocking off Dallas and now San Fran. The Niners had, and still have, a very slim chance at the #1 seed in the NFC, but by virtue of the loss here, have given up the advantage they held for the #2 seed as well. John Skelton came in for an injured Kevin Kolb (shocking!) and did what he does best: keeping both teams in the game. Looking at times lost AND brilliant, Skelton was a turnover machine until it mattered, and then led 2 late TD drives to slay the mighty 49ers.


• Packers (-Not Enough) 46, Raiders 16 - Jason winner, Dre loser - Did Dre call this an upset in the making? The only upset going around would belong to folks who wagered last week on Oakland to cover a big number. This was a meeting of two things that spelled disaster for the Raiders: a QB that throws a generous amount of interceptions, and a defense that excels at takeaways. Carson Palmer found 11 different pass catchers on the day.....too bad 4 of them were Packers.


• Chargers (-7½) 37, Bills 10 - Both winners - I hereby dub San Diego the "Eagles of the AFC" due to the fact that the media loves to blither on about how the Bolts STILL have a little playoff life left in them. I doubt they will do it, but if the Chargers can run the gauntlet of Baltimore, Detroit, and Oakland without a loss, then they deserve the comeback hype. Too bad they wont do it.


• Giants (+4½) 37, Stupidest Team in Football 34 - Both winners - This game was worth it just to see Jerry Jones blowing a gasket over Jason Garrett's time clock management woes. Then, wouldn't you know it, the Giants ice the Cowboys kicker on a made field goal, and then blocked the next attempt to escape with the win. I sure hope Dan Bailey, the Cowboys kicker, doesn't have any incentives built into his contract about field goal percentages, because the ones you make while being "iced"....those don't count.


• Seahawks (-10) 30, Rams 13 - Both winners - Special thanks to Seattle, for getting me to my first 10 win week this year. I'm gonna celebrate with some Skittles.